runnerfivestillalive:

Fic Idea:

“O Noble Thor, King of Asgard. I write to you with an unusual problem. My father seeks to marry me to one among his court. I would prefer not to be ripped in half by a giant dong. Is there one among your court of acceptable social standing and dick size, whom you might recommend me to wed? I have included a picture, for your matchmaking convenience. – Loki, Prince of Jotunheim”

“O Learned Loki, Prince of Jotunheim. I happen to have an appropriately sized dick right here. Please hasten to Asgard, so you may ride it at once. – Thor, King of Asgard”